I hate it when I forget how important spoons are

First of all can I just explain that when I'm stressed or have a lot on my mind I literally can NOT sleep. If you thought boo, then you thought right. I have had wayyy too many nights of 0 sleep in the last several months which is why I'm a goofy gus right now and forgetting important things...
    In less than a week I'm moving into my own place in CO! Its gonna look like no one lives there for a while because my couch and my life are not coming until beginning of June. Thats fine right? I mean I dont need a couch...or lamps...or my box of mismatched socks right now right? Tonight while I was at walmart I figured I would pick up just one or two things that I might need before my stuff comes...like plates,cups, and silverware all that jazz. I was going through in my head everything I'd need and I felt pretty confident that I had everything...which was when I knew I was definitely missing something. I mean everytime I think I've got everything I always end up missing some small trivial item like....shoes, prescription medicine, undies or socks.
     Anyways, long story short I ended up with a shower curtain, because my renters insurance doesn't cover floods if I cause them...lame...
         Well I'd better go...I have a long week full of making cake balls, deep cleaning my office, making chicken salad, going to a wedding, followed immediately by a pool party and at some point I should probably pack my stuff so that I can move monday after work... 

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

 Every couple of months I wake up and worry that I'm becoming boring, and that perhaps I'm becoming content to live out my days in repetitive redundant monotony. I really hate that idea- and when I start to wonder if I'm becoming boring and average I pretty much HAVE to mix things up just to put my mind at ease.

    This brings me to my first item of business: LIVE

        While at the mall window shopping my friend Ryan and I saw a super pretty picture! Since buying the print would cost us $800 we decided it'd be easier ( and more fun..and less boring and monotonous) to just go to the picture! So we packed our lunches, cameras, and of course a thermos of O.J and set off on what would end up being a 15 hour adventure to the Black Canyons of Gunnison CO.

Ryan climbing up the hill/ thang

Uhmm this is me actually falling

Ryans snow ball

Falling after having a Ninja fight

So lesson#1 is basically if you are stuck in a muck and you do the same routine day in and day out- stop waiting to live your life go on a mini road trip!

I guess this brings me to my second point: LAUGH

       Life is no fun if you are serious all the time, or if you are looking for reasons to be offended and gossip all the time. Happiness is WAY more addicting than sadness and laughter is good for the soul! The past weekend I went to the Festival of colors and they were talking about Karma, and how when you sew negativity then you will reap negativity, but when you sew positive upbeat thoughts they cant help but come back to you! This is so true, many times people feel like when they are positive all the time they still get beat down- but the truth is I have never met a grateful positive person that was unhappy. If you feel like you get nothing good in return for being positive- well I hate to say it but you were not being positive. There is a silver lining to EVERY dadgum cloud. True story..heres some goofy pics from that crazy festival

Sharing the peace and love

Just walking to the festival I got colored!

So the Moral of the story is be happy and throw chalk people...

Lastly: LOVE

    Share the love people, and seriously you dont have to be in a relationship to appreciate love and sharing love. Its just like what they said at that color festival- you reap what you sew and you can be a happy peppy loving person ON YOUR OWN. It is your decision, you choose to be happy and you choose to love life, love laughter and love yourself

Perhaps THIS..is why i'm single? :-)

This is Matt, he may look like an ordinary associate at Dick's sporting goods but he's pretty much my boyfriend, or we're married..I cant remember which...all I know is he found my shoes, I threw socks at him and somewhere between here and there we had an entire make-believe life. It was actually pretty hilarious, and I really just like people that can joke and play pretend. Anyways, we aren't really dating or married and I'll probably never see him again.

 

These are my awesome fortune balancing skills. I mean it says to try something new right? I feel good about it...

This is how I look when I'm getting ready for a date :-P

Who needs a spoon? I mean I have skill, I can eat Tapioca Pudding while driving with no spoon. BOOM! People dont appreciate.




So anyways between the boa, the tapioca and my awesome computer skills...which is why my letters will only go so far- I mean I feel confident marriage will be not far off ;-)

I kinda like bad days, if lots of funny bad things happen

Today I had a busy funny day! It started off with wome period drama that I shall spare the readers the details because it was pretty...messy? Then I had a patient tell me he was single, that if I loved the song on the radio he did too, and when I asked him to floss more or something he said " anything for you Heidi", then later I had a patient that I will refer to as Gleeky Gleekerson from gleeksville. I mean, I get gleeked on a lot, and it usually makes me laugh because people have this immidiate look of horror followed by a face that I can usually interpret as something like "maybe it didnt get on her, maybe she didnt notice I gleeked on her" I only know this look because I felt it run across my face once as I cleaned the teeth of a deaf woman. She closed her eyes and relaxed everytime she came in and I was glad..because one morning I had a runny nose...and my mask slid down my face in just enough time for a little drop of snot to fall from my face in slow motion and land *splat* on her face. Oh my emberassing! I pretty much wiped it off immidiately and went about the cleaning.
   Anyways so after my patient boyfriend left,a nd promised to write good things about me on our office facebook wall...and after my gleeky gleekerson who gleeked on my 3 dadgum times. I had..a  no show! So i got to leave work early with some boxes, it was pretty dang windy and I tell you what if you think cardboard doesnt have a mind of its own you thought wrong! I got slapped upside the face with this box lid, and then the wind threw it up in my face and i got clobbered! It was super funny, I really wish someone I knew had video taped it.
    Also I need to not be stressed out...I'm currently at 38 hours awake and counting....

This could have been an episode of criminal minds

       So Monday was my first day temping for my boss' fiance! I got up all early, my hair was cute and I was in boulder 15 minutes early! ( even though it took me almost 2 hours to get there) I was definitely feeling like this was going to be an excellent day! It really was, I had some fun patients got to hang out with a few of my favorite people and ended by following my office manager to the highway so that my gps wouldnt take me all around town before it finally landed me on the highway.
    As I started my car I looked at the gas gage and it was empty and the light was on..but I thought " i can go at least 50 miles before I need gas and I REALLY want to just get to the highway and put gas in once i know where I'm at" So instead of listening to the nagging feeling in my stomach or the voice of reason in the back of my mind, I decided to just drive.
     About a mile or so after my office manager and I split I exited the highway to find a gas station. I got as far as the light and my car sputtered and died. Oh good, excellent timing right? I mean less than a mile from someone that could help you is usually the best place to break down, yes? So I call stalk Greta but I think she has run inside for a second at this point and is not near her phone...suck!
     So I look up the nearest gas station on my half dead phone and see that according to my gps it will take me an hour and a half round trip to go get a gas can...So I'm trying to decide if I should call someone else or just walk..in below freezing temperatures. I look around to see how I would describe where I am in case I do call someone..to my right there is..a mountain and off in the distance a creepy dilapidated building with a lamp post casting an eerie light on it, to my left is a small brick building of some sort- looks like an outhouse but I doubt that's what it was, and straight ahead was pitch black nothingness. Everything but the road was still covered in about two foot of snow and looking mighty desolate if I do say so myself.
     Just as I was feeling a little discouraged I look over and a tall scruffy looking guy hops out of a white VW bus ( serial killer car??) and starts walking over to me. If he is a killer I'm basically screwed because lets face it, my car is not going anywhere- its freezing outside, and no one is around...awesome
    So he comes over to my window which I have now cracked just a smidge and asks if I need help. I tell him that I've run out of gas and ask if there is a gas station near by? He says yes and then asks if I'd like him to give me a ride... I thought about it for a second, and after thinking about what my mother would say if I jumped in the car with this kid I said " well...I just dont know if you're a murderer or not" ..he looks at me, probably wondering if I'm serious or not, and says "well I'm not....but I guess you have a good point ok well want me to go get some gas and bring it back?" and he did just that.
    Meanwhile Greta comes to my rescue same time my serial killer comes back with gas and we put it in and they tell me to start it! I happily run over to my car and grab the door handle only to realize that I've locked my keys in the car...oh and by the way it just started snowing. Dont worry friends I have a spare key always for situations like this, so I hop in and start her up! Well..I try to start her up....thing is my car is still pretty upset about the whole it not having gas thing and it is not about to start with just one gallon.
    So long story short Greta takes me to the gas station I fill up, and an hour after this whole shenanigan started I am finally on my way home...

Moral of the story: keep your tank above the E, and if you are being a good Samaritan maybe dont ask the girl where she lives bc it will just make her think you really are a serial killer 

Awkward moments define my life

Things that have embarrassed in the last..week?

• Realizing I was wearing my black scrub pants with a GIANT hole in the booty on my mock boards super important professional day while in New Mexico for my local anesthesia class...black scrub pants, hot pink thong...yeahhhh I bet the dentist was expecting me to pull out a boom box and introduce myself as Bambi at any moment...I didnt even notice for several hours either!!
• Texting a cute boy and realizing that you may have texted something like "penis" instead of "ponies"- maybe this belongs in my "this is why I'm single" blog? hahahaha
• I am probably the only person that could say something via text and have it make me look like a stalker...seriously I didnt know you had a bird bath...and I've never toilet papered a house in my life...but in a way I feel super talented for always being able to guess and make myself look either guilty or like a stalker :-)
• Probably should have put those black scrub pants in a different spot so when I was running late monday I didnt wear them to work 
• I always introduce myself to my patients while I'm walking back to my operatory, today I turned for a SECOND and almost walked into the doorway- awesome!
• Jumped into the revolving door thing, the guy pushing it was HUGE with big tall people legs and Im all short with little midget legs and I was really hurrying and he freaking HIT me with the revolving door so hard I almost fell and then he turned and gave me a stank face...I was like woah did I just get hit with a revolving door? what am I 4 years old? heh...ouch

Hahah ohhh man I am a DORK huh? but its ok- thats why we love me :-)
OOOHHHHH GUESS WHAT!!! I'm fixin to spend the weekend house sitting with fabulous things like a hot tub, a treadmill, and a giant dog!!! heck yes friends!! yayyy Heidi is happy!!

Got to get this to NOT do list off my mind!

Tomorrow is a very busy, very scary day. Tomorrow is when I *gulp* start anesthetizing people. It shouldnt be that hard but instead of putting together a to do list, I figured a to NOT do list might serve me better...

• Don't paralized someones face ( but if I do take pictures of them making various faces while the paralized side stays still)
• Don't tear an artery and cause someones face to swell and bruise..for 2 weeks ( but once again if I do take pictures of a pretend epic fight scene since they will look like the crap got beat out of one side of the face)
• Dont cause trismus ( pain in the muscle from too many injections in one place)
• Dont inject into an artery causing immediate overdose and anesthetic toxicity... especially not if it leads to cardiac arrest, that'd be emberassing and I think would probably lead to me failing
• Dont stick myself with the needle while trying to re-cap ( who knows what kind of diseases these people are carrying..Hep C! the Herp! COMMON COLD!!!)
• Don't trip while carrying needle to contaminated sharps container, because that would most likely lead to me stabbing myself with a 25 gauge needle ( probably in the arm or chest and I'd hate to break a contaminated needle in my and have some dramatic problem like part of it is being carried in my blood and on its way to my heart...no time for that people this thing ends saturday)

And really I guess my MAIN goals are not to have my face paralized ( although I think I could pull this face off very well...)

 or end up looking like I got beat up...because the sweatheart ball is coming up quick and I'd like for all the boys to swoon